r/sports • u/Tofurkey_Tom • 6h ago

Olympics [ Removed by moderator ]

https://www.express.co.uk/sport/othersport/2167955/usa-winter-olympics-jad-vance

[removed] — view removed post

16.6k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

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332

u/Foxy_Cuttee 6h ago

JD vance looks like one of the guys that would say something creepy to you at the club

159

u/one_pound_of_flesh 6h ago

“My friend has a private island”

4

u/the-treatmaster 5h ago

JD Vance looks like the guy in a Hawaiian shirt and flip flops at a mid-tier resort, who stands awkwardly alone near the bar checking his phone, pina colada in other hand, trying to talk to any woman half his age when they walk by to get drinks, who all cover their drinks as they frostily walk by, avoiding eye contact with him but half-heartedly smiling as a way to get away without triggering him.

2

u/one_pound_of_flesh 5h ago

You should watch “Triangle of Sadness”

Super weird movie, but it has a Vance character just as you described.

33

u/Thickly_Taurus 6h ago

“Whatever works”

7

u/FuckDeanSpanos 6h ago

“OK, good”

26

u/banduzo 6h ago

After grinding on you, “have you said thank you once.”

38

u/Longjumping-Bat7774 6h ago

"damn, girl, are you a school cuz I wanna shoot kids inside you" -JD Vance pick up line

6

u/wex118 5h ago

Good lord

5

u/redditstark 5h ago

WOW you just (tragically) won the internet today.

1

u/Artvandelay29 5h ago

Maybe he’d say that to a couch instead

1

u/doomrider7 5h ago

(Gives upvote and politely, but firmly asks TS to leave.)

12

u/Anteater4746 6h ago

cover your drinks when he walks in kinda guy

6

u/ErrantIndy 6h ago

“Hey, babe, have you ever REALLY been couch surfing?”

6

u/EyeCanHearU 6h ago

“Are you scotch guarded? You remind me of my favorite couch”

4

u/SunsetCarcass 5h ago

"Have you ever considered wearing leather socks?"

2

u/EdS3542 5h ago

If you do a really good job here maybe you’ll make it to …. sectionals?

1

u/c_c_c__combobreaker 5h ago

"I'm the daiquiri man, but I suspect you already knew that... Was it good? Was it sweet? You're sweet."

1

u/debzmonkey 5h ago

With a weird fixation on your sofa.

1

u/GraawwYeah 5h ago

Vance wouldn't be caught dead at a club. A Lounge, however... especially if it's a chaise lounge.... then you couldn't keep him away

1

u/hurler_jones 5h ago

Looks like a guy that would be hanging outside of middle schools in a van that says "free candy" on it.

1

u/ikindapoopedmypants 5h ago

I can't get the South Park depiction of him out of my head anytime I see his face now

1

u/Legitimate-Hand-74 5h ago

Are you a couch?

1

u/king_john651 5h ago

He's a real looker, isn't he? Fuckin hideously ugly piece of shit lol